Happiness Tool : Looking for the Good

Happiness Tool : Looking for

the Good

Another trick that can help speed things along

on the journey to happiness is looking for the

lesson and the gift in everything. If you look

hard enough, you can find something to learn

and some good in any situation.

Many events and situations seem terrible at

the time, but from our limited view, it’s

sometimes hard to tell what’s bad and what‘s

good. There’s a famous Chinese story where a

man loses his horse. Everyone says how

terrible it is, but he says it could be bad, or it

could be good, who can tell? Later, the horse

returns with a second horse. Everyone says

how great that is, but he says it could be good,

or it could be bad, who can tell? His son loves

riding the new horse, but falls off and breaks

his leg. Everyone says how terrible that is, but

he says it could be bad, or it could be good,

who can tell? Later, all of the able-bodied

young men are drafted to fight a battle, and

most of them are killed, but the son can’t go

because of his broken leg. Everyone says how

wonderful that is, but he says it could be good,

or it could be bad, who can tell?

We never know how things will turn out, so we

might as well assume there is some good in

everything that happens. In fact, if we look for

something to learn or something to appreciate

and find it, then there is some good in it, even

if there wasn’t before.

In Happy for no Reason, Marci Shimoff

recommends assuming that the universe is

friendly and has your best interests at heart,

and everything that happens is for your good.26

When I first read this, I thought it was naïve

and silly, not to say blatantly untrue, but she

recommends trying it for a week. You don’t

have to believe it for real, just assume it for

the sake of argument, the way something is

assumed at the beginning of a math proof.

Then go about life and see how you feel.